I needn’t have worried about the direction of this artwork because I’m not on my own with my art -making. The closed loop of self-reliance has been broken.
For a long time the mentality worked for me. I took the pictures, I worked with the pictures, I presented the new artwork. I did things by myself, for myself, because of myself. I was answerable to no-one and my art represented me and me alone. This was important because it allowed me self-reflection and understanding of what I wanted to be. It helped me evolve my own psychological state as well as my own artistic practice. My self-meditations were useful in resolving all sorts of current and historical issues.
But I have evolved beyond this. I am strong enough to stand on my own feet but I am also strong enough to share my ideas beyond the usual group work or basic collaborations. I can trust another person to work in my headspace and the responsibility of ordering the chaos with this new artwork can be shared with my collaborator. There is no burden and no isolation. I do not have to pour over books or struggle to work things out on my own.
Instead I can turn to discussion, communication, and joint instinct. The ideas and directions flow naturally and it’s more like a mutual symbiosis between our thinking. It just is what it is and how it is. And because of this I have progressed more in the last 24 hours with this new artwork than I ever would have managed on my own.
I am very lucky.